It’s been 8 months since I held these babies in my arms. It feels like yesterday. I can still feel their weightless boney bodies in my arms. I can hear Tamandani’s cries. I can smell their scent. I can see their dirty little faces with those deep dark brown eyes. It doesn’t matter if my eyes are open or closed….those faces are always with me. I remember how it felt to walk away with their sister and leave them behind. I can feel the hot tears running down my face and landing on their little bald heads. I remember praying over them…not an eloquent poetic prayer, but a prayer of a heartbroken mother. A prayer that starts with “Oh God please….and through the tears your voice shakes and then goes silent and you know its okay because God knows your thoughts. I try not to question God and His plan although I don’t understand. I don’t know why the twins are separated or why Savannah-Hope is able to gain hope of a new life while they are left in a situation they may not survive. I feel grateful for the miracle of Savannah-Hope but my heart breaks….for her sisters….left behind.
Everyday I thank God for the children he has given me and the time I have with them. Being gone from them for 40 days has helped me appreciate and cherish every moment. I am thankful that I am the one to put the band-aids on their scraped knees, to read the bedtime stories, to scrub the chocolate stain out of their shirt, to mop up their spilt juice, referee their squabbles, administer their medicine, wipe their tears away, tickle their tummys, cheer them on as they master a new task, taxi them to activities, the hugs, the kisses….and to hear the “mommy I love you’s”. I am careful to not let our hopes for the future, take my focus away from the everyday blessings.
On Christmas Eve morning I received a phone call about the twins. I knew that their care packages had been delivered. The news we received was devastating. The girls are starving. One of them went without a bite of food the day before. They have lost a tremendous amount of weight. It is painful for them to be touched. Their bones are sticking out, their bellies are swollen and full of worms. They are sick, very sick. The tears flowed and my chest grew tight. I saw the living conditions 8 months ago. I can picture it as clear if I were standing there right now. I had heard a few weeks ago from Brother Gentry that their villages were experiencing a great famine. I know its rainy season. I know the type of care they are getting in the village.
I was told that the family was asked to consider allowing the children to enter Good Samaritan (orphanage where Savannah-Hope lived). The family was to have a meeting and then notify the orphanage director of their answer.
I have held these babies in my arms. I have felt their hearts beating against mine. I tasted their salty tears as I smothered them in kisses. My heart was so heavy hearing how they have deteriorated. I cried and cried. I prayed and put it in God’s hands. I made a decision to enjoy Christmas with my 5 little miracles. I soaked them up and hugged them tight. We laughed and played and celebrated the eve of Jesus’ birth.
On Christmas Day I received another phone call stating that the family is not willing to relinquish the girls. Out of respect for them and Savannah-Hope’s privacy I am not going to share their reasons. I will say that I am praying without ceasing that they have a change of heart. I am praying that they will choose to give them a chance to live.
Everyday I thank God for the children he has given me and the time I have with them. Being gone from them for 40 days has helped me appreciate and cherish every moment. I am thankful that I am the one to put the band-aids on their scraped knees, to read the bedtime stories, to scrub the chocolate stain out of their shirt, to mop up their spilt juice, referee their squabbles, administer their medicine, wipe their tears away, tickle their tummys, cheer them on as they master a new task, taxi them to activities, the hugs, the kisses….and to hear the “mommy I love you’s”. I am careful to not let our hopes for the future, take my focus away from the everyday blessings.
On Christmas Eve morning I received a phone call about the twins. I knew that their care packages had been delivered. The news we received was devastating. The girls are starving. One of them went without a bite of food the day before. They have lost a tremendous amount of weight. It is painful for them to be touched. Their bones are sticking out, their bellies are swollen and full of worms. They are sick, very sick. The tears flowed and my chest grew tight. I saw the living conditions 8 months ago. I can picture it as clear if I were standing there right now. I had heard a few weeks ago from Brother Gentry that their villages were experiencing a great famine. I know its rainy season. I know the type of care they are getting in the village.
I was told that the family was asked to consider allowing the children to enter Good Samaritan (orphanage where Savannah-Hope lived). The family was to have a meeting and then notify the orphanage director of their answer.
I have held these babies in my arms. I have felt their hearts beating against mine. I tasted their salty tears as I smothered them in kisses. My heart was so heavy hearing how they have deteriorated. I cried and cried. I prayed and put it in God’s hands. I made a decision to enjoy Christmas with my 5 little miracles. I soaked them up and hugged them tight. We laughed and played and celebrated the eve of Jesus’ birth.
On Christmas Day I received another phone call stating that the family is not willing to relinquish the girls. Out of respect for them and Savannah-Hope’s privacy I am not going to share their reasons. I will say that I am praying without ceasing that they have a change of heart. I am praying that they will choose to give them a chance to live.
The family member that has control of the twins' custody is supposed to be traveling to Good Samaritan on Monday for a second meeting. Please pray with me for Tamandani and Sidala and their future.
3 comments:
Hey Crystal...that's really hard for a person to go on with their day having this info in their head...I'm going to go an donate food somewhere!!!!!!
I am praying that the family considers letting the girls go to the orphanage...i think of those girls often.
I'm also praying here...those two little ones deserve to have their miracle, just like SH did...
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